Transformers (2007)

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Transformers is a summer special effects extravaganza starring Shia LaBeouf as the descendant of an Arctic explorer who gets caught up in a war between rival factions of a robotic alien race.

Michael Bay – the scourge of modern cinema – once again foregoes anything so unnecessary as a plot, interesting characters or meaningful dialogue, instead preferring to fill the screen with as much CGI and explosions as possible, using the pretty young cast as window dressing. Admittedly, the special effects are magnificent, the robots superbly designed and animated and as they rocket around the screen, guns blazing and constantly morphing as they go, it makes for a breathtaking spectacle. Unfortunately, as soon as any of the characters open their mouths you are reminded just how juvenile and idiotic it all is; Bay’s insistence on only ever casting actresses who look like playmates of the month is insulting and every black character – and even one of the robots – is a blatant and crude racial stereotype.

Although superficially eye-boggling, Transformers is nothing but an extended toy commercial and weighing in at nearly two and a half hours it’s just plain insulting to the intelligence of all but the very youngest of its audience.

3.5/10

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