Once upon a time, there was a Hollywood scriptwriter.
He lived in a magical land where marine archaeologists were all tanned calendar hunks who were like a cross between a frat boy and Rambo, and where World Health Organisation doctors were tenacious and morally courageous but more importantly, looked like supermodels. Unfortunately, the rest of the world was populated by vicious amoral megalomaniacs – foreigners, of course – but luckily all their henchmen made the ones in Austin Powers look like quantum physicists, so our heroes could save the day using only coincidences that were so utterly absurd – yet at the same time, astonishingly predictable – they beggared belief. Huzzah!
Matthew McConaughey’s agent has a Hell of a lot to answer for in terms of squandering talent and William H. “You’ve got 72 hours and not a nanosecond more!” Macy…? Hang your head in shame. Absolute drivel.