Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle Of Life (2003)


Lara Croft finds a novelty bowling ball that can reveal the location of Pandora’s Box – if you play it a jaunty tune – and so sets off to retrieve said box before an evil scientist uses it to unleash a plague on mankind.

This preposterous plot is a virtual carbon copy of the plot to The Mummy Returns although quite why anyone would want to actually copy such inane nonsense is beyond me. This film reminded me of one of those globetrotting action movies Jackie Chan used to make, but whereas Chan would’ve injected a lot of humour into the proceedings, this film just joylessly lumbers from one unexciting and formulaic set piece to the next. Angelina Jolie gamely strips to her skinnies and runs around shooting the extras, the entire film fuelled solely by her sex appeal but the direction is sloppy and lazy and it’s very difficult to care about any of it.

The Cradle Of Life virtually devoid of any imagination or invention and is surely one of the most soulless, mechanical exercises in making a fast buck I’ve seen yet.



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